My Truly Canadian Olympic Games Moment

I have been really enjoying the Winter Olympics.

To the point of distraction.

Staying up far too late watching skiing and ski jumping and moguls and snowboarding and half pipe and speed skating and figure skating and dance skating and …

.. and curling

.. and hockey.

The one point of these Vancouver games that I anticipated was "how would they light the Olympic Torch?" – that big mammoth glorified gas fireplace that sits above the city for all to see for the duration of the game – only to be snuffed at the end with the remainder of the flame shipped back to Greece to be stored like Lord Stanley's Cup.

"Where would they put it?", I wondered.

"Why up in the mountains – on Whistler –so high it would shine down on all like the Hollywood sign in Los Angeles", I answered myself.

You should worry when you answer your own questions – or so they tell me. Especially me. I am usually giving myself bad information.

But my answer made perfect sense - to me.

"So how would they light it?", I countered myself again.

Well let's see.

In Atlanta – they had Muhammad Ali light it. That was a wonderful scene – the great Ali in heroic fashion mastering his challenges to ignite the flame.

Moving - In true American style.

In Barcelona they had an Archer stand at the bottom of the great arena – and the last runner of the torch lit the end of the Archer's arrow – and he shot it up into the sky – landing in the center of the caldron – and igniting the Olympic flame!

Legendary – in true Spanish flare!

In Beijing – the entire upper wall of the arena depicted scenes from all across China – and a runner ran all the way around the huge electronic banner and lit the flame at the end.

Honorable – in true Chinese tradition.

So how would Canada do it?

"I know, they could have a ski jump above the torch, and a ski-jumper slide down the great ramp – floating as only a ski-jumper can – and land inside the torch to ignite the flame - but who would we sacrifice at these games? You couldn't survive that, could you?"

But Vancouver trumped my expectations.

Vancouver selected Wayne Gretzky – the Great One – old 99 himself – to be the lighter of the torch.

The Great One was selected above others such as Terry Fox's mother – the young man who ran across Canada after losing a leg to Cancer – to raise awareness of Cancer across our entire Country – only succumb to it before he could finish his quest.

He is truly our greatest Canadian ever.

If Terry Fox were still with us – I would hope he would have had the honor.

"So what would the Great One do? Light a hockey puck on fire and shoot it into the torch? That would be really cool."

Nope.

Ya see, here is what they did.

They got a yellow pickup truck.

And they gave the Great One the torch – and they made him stand up in the back of the pick-up.

And then – in the pouring rainy mist that only Vancouver can muster year around – they made old ninety-nine hold that torch up and they drove him through downtown Vancouver – to the hidden location of the great Olympic Torch ...

(which weren't on no mountain at all - it was locked up tight downtown - so no one could snatch it)

... and they unlocked the gate so he could get in, and he walked over to the torch and lit it.

Ta-da!

In true humble and modest Canadian fashion.

Oh my.

I kept waiting for the pick-up truck to pull into a Tim Horton's donut shop to get an extra large double-double for the trip – or maybe stop at the beer store to grab a two-four of Labatt's or Molson's.

The Olympic Beer Run tradition would have been started right here in Canada.

Now that's Canadiana, baby!

I do love my country so very much. And in a way – I do think The Great One's lift in the back of a pick-up was a fitting tribute to our mighty land of hosers.

Bob and Doug McKenzie would have been prouder than punch.

And we all have another wonderful Olympic memory.

So for all the wondrous - and disastrous – things that have happened in these 2010 Olympic Games in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada …

The lighting of the torch is still the highlight of the games to me.

I plan to talk about if for a long, long time.

Detroit Tigers Offseason - What The Hell Is Going On?

This story was originally posted as the first on my new blog "Tigers Baseball Outsider"

This has been a very confusing off season to say the least.

And it started that day in late September 2009 when once beloved Maglio Ordonez achieved enough at bats to trigger the option on a huge contract bonus of thirty three million of Tiger owner Mike Ilitch's hard earned dollars for the 2010 season.

After a lackluster three quarters of the 2009 season.

And even though Mags finished 2009 with a flourish, the Tigers finished 2009 with a flop.

I still shiver when I think of those last two games of the regular season. So I won't relive them for you. You remember them too.

Or that single game playoff against the Minnesota Twinkies in the dome from hell.

Have they torn that damn thing down yet?

And then the dominos – the repercussions of Mags contract option – started the dominos toppling.

We bid farewell to Placido Polanco as the stalwart and steadfast rock of the infield and master of the clutch hit was refused arbitration and allowed to move on to Phillidelphia.

And if that weren't unthinkable enough – Curtis Granderson – beloved star center fielder and all-around-good-guy destined to be the face of the franchise - is traded to the Yankees.

A kick in the groin to Tiger fans.

"The money just wasn't there to keep those guys", we are told.

Two new young minor leaguers are received for Granderson – Austin Jackson – a centerfielder that the Sporting News projected to be the rookie of the year in 2010, and Max Scherzer - a reasonable pitcher at best.

Scott Sizemore was decided to be brought up from AAA Toledo – only to break a bone in his ankle in an Arizona fall league game. He is still slated as I know it to be Placido's second base placebo replacement.

"Okay", we all thought, "This Mags contract option is costing us our big names and most beloved players … but we can carry on – there's no money and the team is moving into a younger state of mind."

That's when they signed Jose Valverde – a quality closer (to fill the vacancy of rollercoaster Tiger closer Fernando Rodney – who was also not offered arbitration) from Houston – for fourteen million dollars.

I thought Ilitch was pinching pennies this year?

I thought that's why we lost Granderson … and Polanco?

What the ….

Now, as I write this, the rumor mill is spewing the sour news that the Tigers are on the verge of signing Johnny "Curtis Granderson took my job" Damon to a two year fourteen million dollar contract also.

What is it with two years and fourteen million dollars contracts?

This leaves us to question why then did we lose Granderson and Polanco?

It couldn't have been the money?

It must have been a determination to go in a different direction. Not necessarily a young direction. Just in a direction without Granderson and Polanco?

Yet still we have Carlos Guillen in left? He doesn't want to play left field any more than Inge wanted to catch?

And we still have Brandon Inge – easily tied with Granderson and ace Justin Verlander as the most favourite Tigers.

And we still have Mags – without his head of curls – that once lopped off – reduced him to a mere shadow of his former power-hitting self – and the root of what we all thought the problem was.

We kept the weakest links on the roster – and we got rid of our stability leaders?

Oh, I know – only the players who flourished last season have trade value. But we got nothing for Placido, and we got unproven hopes in Austin Jackson for Curtis?

It just doesn't make sense. Not from the outside. Not from where I sit.

But the good news is that the Tigers are still in the American League Central Division. The weakest division in all of Major League Baseball.

So the Tigers still have a shot.

An outsiders shot … but a shot.

No matter my confusion, or disappointment, or frustration in trying to understand the void in rationale of this offseason, I will still root for those who wear the old English D. I will still listen to and watch every pitch on the radio or TV. I will still pump my fist when we win a close one, or utter profanities should we fail to pull one out in the bottom of the ninth with two men on and no outs.

Just like last year … when we led the AL Central from May 10^th to the single game playoff in that disgusting dome.

We still have a shot.

And remember … we weren't supposed to be any good at all in 2006.

And for certain … the Tigers aren't supposed to be anygood in 2010.

So we got a pretty good shot.

Albeit and outside one.

Ringing Out The Oh-Ohs

Let the countdown to the end of 2009 begin.

I for one will not be sorry to see this sorry excuse of a year come to a close. And "don't let the door knob hit you where the good lord split you" on your way out 2K9.

Good riddance to this last decade as well.

Whatever it was called.

After a decade of this new millennium now, we still don't have a common easy way to refer to this last ten years. In my life time, we had the 60s, the 70's, the 80's and the 90's. But what do we call this first ten years of this new millennium?

I would suggest we call this last decade the "Oh-Ohs".

More bad than good came of this last decade.

That's an understatement.

The millennium opened with the American election and inauguration of the Dub-ya administration ruling the U.S. after a twisted electoral vote dispute over hanging chads in the state of Florida – governed at the time by Dub-ya's brother Jeb. A short nine months later we witnessed the event that changed the western world - the 911 attacks.

This led to chasing down Osama Bin Laden in Afghanistan that somehow was deferred to invading Iraq.

Fear gripped the world – most noticeably in the United States. Homeland Security became the most powerful branch of law enforcement in the lower forty-eight, highlighted by its designer security threat color codes.

I forget now how threatening fuchsia was.

As well, gas prices soared through the roof, while Iran started threatening with nuclear missile development.

China rose to the forefront of economic power – while North America watched it's jobs leave the west and move into the eastern lands of China and India.

And then came Katrina – which showed us just how Mother Nature could take advantage of a neglected city like New Orleans and turn it into a soup bowl over night. Having spent a good deal of time in New Orleans in the early eighties, this incident really disturbed me in how badly the aftermath played out.

Then there was a tsunami that devastated the populations of the Malaysian coastal areas.

And earthquakes devastating areas in China and Pakistan.

And all the while the Africans kept killing each other in a battle of the genocides.

Last year the financial meltdown as big as the great depression of the 1930's threw many in financial disparity.

Business failed.

Jobs lost.

Homes foreclosed on.

Banks failed and major financial institutions came close to folding – caused by years of corporate executive greed with multimillion dollar bonuses being paid to those very executives who put in place the practices that caused the meltdown.

The American banks received trillions of dollars in American Bailout monies. Other nations like Great Britain followed suit.

And General Motors – the company that once gauged the prosperity of North America went into bankruptcy proceedings and had to be floated by billion dollar bailout package to restructure and be overseen by a government appointed Automotive Czar.

As well, Al Gore – the very presidential candidate that lost to Dub-ya in the election of 2000 by a hanging chad – has spent the last ten years growing beards and shaving them off as he shows the world his power point presentation about the irreversible effects of global warming – and chanting "I told you so" every time we see an odd weather pattern appear.

Ten years into the millenium and we sit in a tough situation – high debt owed to China – skilled professional jobs outsourced to underdeveloped nations abroad – wars on two fronts – and some say the worse is yet to come.

And Osama Bin Laden is still nowhere to be found.

The Oh-Ohs indeed.

The western world is far worse for wear that it was a decade ago.

And many actually believe the ending of the Mayan calendar in 2012 means the end of the world.

Thanks Nostradamus. Great timing.

Let's usher this decade out with all the grief we can muster, and usher in the next decade of the Teens with all the celebration, pomp and ceremony that we possibly can.

Because while I would like to tell you that it can't get much worse – it certainly can.

But we can't dwell on how bad it might be.

We need to knuckle down now to do our best to ensure this next decade unfolds much better.

An awakening.

A resurrection.

We need to find an alternative to fossil fuels to not only stem the tide of pollutants in our environment, but more importantly (in my personal opinion) to neutralize the power and influence of the oil barons and the dastardly (bastardly) destruction the lust for oil has created.

We need to find ways to use this new technology we spent the last decade building other than to download movies and music illegally to really bring cultures together to find common grounds – lowest common denominators of understanding – to work together.

To understand each other.

We need to do something different.

If we are moving into a global shift of power – from North America to Asian and Persia – we need to understand the causes of that shift – and what our new roles will likely be. And how we can perhaps shift that balance back to a more equal level.

I believe this next decade will be ten years of the greatest opportunities mankind has yet to encounter. And how we embrace these challenges will determine our ability to grasp these opportunities to benefit of all of us.

Or maybe the Mayans are right?

If we don't start the awakening soon, the Mayan's may as well be right.

Join with me now as we kiss the "Oh-Ohs" good bye- and lets join hands and celebrate what can be. What should be.

On New Year's Eve 2009, have the one you love by your side – take their hand – and make the commitment together to embrace this next decade with all the optimism and spirit of community you can muster.

Happy New Year everybody. And raise your glass high to a happy new decade.

And next year - this next decade- may we all win.

Whatever we call it.